Shaking the Guilt is the name of a new weekly series I will be writing about overcoming day to day pangs of guilt that get in the way of our happiness. (Weekly blogs are my goal, but right now I give myself permission to miss a few weeks, otherwise I’ll have to blog about Writer’s Guilt…hmm, not a bad idea.)
People pleasing, ‘Can’t say ‘no’, especially to God’, Sister Mary Patricia (me) at age 21.
Recently I was reading an article written in praise of a nun that had passed over to her heavenly reward. The piece said that “sister didn’t know how to say ‘no,’ she was so full of energy.” Doing a little reflection I was taken aback at how the “never saying ‘no'” is some kind of ideal that we should all aspire to; as if going around as the “bobbing ‘yes’ doll” is what we should all be doing. How do you say “no” nicely? How do you protect your own time and happiness without feeling guilty about not meeting others expectations of you. I offer you a quick, easy, and polite way out.
When asked to do something that your “little gut feeling” is tugging at your stomach, wanting to decline…listen to that reluctance and merely say: “I think I’ll have to pass.” Stop. No further explanation is needed. We often think that we need to go on further with our excuses, sounding like the queen of endless droning, giving our feeble excuses more substance. Just that simple, “I think I’ll have to pass”. Relax, take a deep breath and rest assured that you will protect your own happiness.
What do you wish you had said ‘no’ to? Please share you “I should have said NO! stories in the “Leave a Reply” section below.
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If you mess up, don’t feel guilty – it’s par for the course. Let me know. I won’t be able to help, but I can empathize!
