As the year winds down, we usually take a quick inventory reflecting on our lives to see where there is room for improvement. With pen in hand we quickly make resolutions to reach some “ideal” in the New Year.
Society, also dumps a burden on us to “better ourselves” with resolve, as we are bombarded with the high expectations from our culture. Magazines, conversations, and advertisements all focus on the high stakes of expectations. We are flooded with the coveted prize of the “perfect family”, the “man of my dreams”, the “gifted child”, or the “ideal weight”.
We all want to improve but what happens if we don’t lose those 10 pounds, or our child is less than perfect, or we miss the mark of that daily exercise routine? In reality, false expectations can get us in big trouble.
Looking for the “ideal” can break our hearts and kill our hope. Not to mention the pangs of guilt. We all have had the feeling of dashed hope and shattered expectations. No matter what area of life we look at, we all have the experience of having reality fall short of certain expectations.
I would suggest that instead of resolutions this year, that may come and go by February, that you make one intention that can influence your whole life: Choosing to make each day happy. There is a saying, “Every day may not be a good day, but there is good in very day.” One of the best “resolutions” or “intentions” is to find that “good”…Here’s an example.
A 92-year-old man, who recently lost his wife, had to be admitted to a nursing home, since he no longer could live on his own. After patiently waiting to be shown to his new living quarters, the facility escort took the man’s arm to lead him to his room. Walking through the corridor lined with doors decorated to make a home out of institutional living, the elderly gentleman commented on how much he liked his room. But they were only half way to their destination.
“But you haven’t seen your room yet,” said the young assistant. Surmising the gent’s advanced age brought on confusion at the new place, she smiled at him.
“That doesn’t have anything to do with it,” the old man countered. “Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time.”
The pair continued to shuffle down the hall. The young assistant looked askance at the old man, and he read her scrunched brow. “Whether I like my room or not doesn’t depend on how the furniture is arranged…it’s how I arrange my mind,” the old man explained. “I already decided to love it.”
His words packed a powerful punch—not just for the caregiver who heard them, but for us. Like the old man, we need to arrange our minds to look for the new wonderful, the happiness right there under our noses.
Happiness is a choice. Let’s set the usual resolutions aside this year and “intend” to find good…find good in every person, every situation, every day.
