The virtue of patience is not my long suit.
Last week I experienced an epi (epidural steroid injection) in my cervical spine. Listening to the instructions I didn’t think a little shot could be that much. After the numbing serum and the interventions sedative, the shot itself wasn’t that bad.
What I did encounter was the surprise reaction at my lack of patience when I was out of my comfort zone of not feeling like my old self. I felt impatient with myself, others and probably God if I hadn’t realized that this was a very temporary setback.
I was a little woozier than I usually am! Leaving the doctor’s office I had Joe’s steady arm to guide me. I had to clutch the handrail to keep from stumbling down the steps. (I don’t do “dependent” well either.)
Once at breakfast I could raise my right arm to a certain height and then it would just drop. I couldn’t pick up my coffee with my right arm without scalding myself.
Finding some relief that these setbacks were to last a few hours, I thought of all the times that I have been impatient with others who suffer with all kinds of impairments and some permanently with certain ailments. I berated myself thinking how I take my good health for granted.
I mentally apologized for all the times that people failed to meet my time expectations. I reflected on all the times I tapped my toes in the grocery line as older feebler people fumbled paying for their groceries. Or when I lose patience walking behind slower amblers in crowds, waiting in lines for older or physically challenged people, and repeating comments for the hearing impaired. (We are not even going to mention the impatience in the car with drivers!)
Like a spreading plague, our impatience carries over to God. We want our prayers answered on our schedules in the manner we see fit.
We feel the crunch of time. We have deadlines to meet, and God seems to be on a different schedule than us. We forget the God is on DST, Divine Standard Time.
We think we know what is best for us. When God has a new lesson for us to learn or has something better in mind for us, we lose patience when the divine answer is other than what we expect. We forget that God has the bigger plan and sees the whole picture.
Finding patience with ourselves, others and God will lessen the stress in our lives and fill us with gratitude.
Remember we are works in progress.
Dear Lord, Grant me patience with myself, others and you. Help me remain in the state of gratitude by accepting each person and situation for what it is. Help me dismiss my expectations. Yes Lord, grant me patience NOW.